Reflecting on My Anxieties from the Airplane

After finishing an in-flight meal and reading through research materials on different countries' educational systems, I dozed off. Upon waking, I felt my resolve, strengthened by my last journal entry, suddenly wavering again.
This trip, in fact, was unexpectedly and abruptly arranged, leaving me with an incredibly short time to prepare. Even up to the day before departure, I couldn’t shake a lingering sense of unease. I recall how tense I felt, even this morning.

As the trip was so hastily decided, I only managed to list the necessary items two days prior. My suitcase was at my 
parents' house, so I couldn’t even properly pack. The night before the trip, I was suddenly informed about essential entry documents I needed to prepare. Scrambling to gather everything, I felt a wave of frustration wash over me.

To add to it all, I hadn’t had the time to sufficiently consider the four countries I'll be visiting from a marketing perspective, which left me feeling uncertain about my preparedness. As the only marketer on this trip, the weight of that responsibility further burdened me. Moreover, I couldn’t help but feel disappointed in myself for not sticking to the resolutions I’d made in my last journal entry.

I’m someone who always strives to make the best choices. There’s a deeply ingrained fear of making decisions I won’t be satisfied with. To avoid that anxiety, I’ve tried to stay prepared, finding comfort in being ahead of things. But as time has passed, I've come to realize that the world rarely moves according to my plans. Myresponsibilities have only grown, both at home and at work, and the choices I have to make have become even more complicated.

Now, however, I want to focus less on making the “perfect” choice and instead embrace the process itself. Every decision has its pros and cons, and I've come to see that finding meaning in the journey of decision-making and reflecting on what I’ve learned is more valuable than the outcome alone.

At the time I am writing this, the plane is already in the air. I plan to spend the remaining flight time grounding my scattered thoughts and finding some inner peace. While I know my reflections may not be perfect, I hope to gain some perspective and calm during these seven days abroad, exploring a world much larger than my own.

I am profoundly grateful to my family, especially my husband, whose support and love have made this all possible. I hope that this trip will bring yet another opportunity for growth in my life.

 

Final Event : Night View of Taipei 101